Illuminati News

May 28, 2013

“Illuminati Assemble!” Bono & Branson Make Fun of Illuminati Conspiracy Theories

Following a campaign launched by Hollywood actor, Matt Damon, in which he vowed not to go to the toilet until everyone in third world countries had access to clean water and sanitation, attention whores Bono and Richard Branson leapt in front of the camera to show their support for the cause and reiterate to us all what wonderful philanthropists they both are, while at the same time using the opportunity to rather oddly and quite pitifully attempt to satirise illuminati “conspiracy theories”.

Appearing on a YouTube video with Olivia Wilde, who also doesn’t waste the opportunity to tell us how proud she is of how she supposedly founded a school in Haiti, billionaires Bono and Branson both joke about how Matt Damon first brought up the idea at “a meeting of the illuminati” during which a fight broke out between Bono (the honorary Knight Commander of the Order of the British Empire and self proclaimed pacifist), and Damon. The three stooges then continue to read from their scripts in what transpires to be a highly unfunny and cringeworthy video that closes with Richard Branson shouting “Illuminati assemble!”

Aside from the apparent objective to supply everyone in the third world with clean water before they take a dump (which I won’t hold my breath for), this appears to be a desperate and dire attempt to get two of the richest and well known men on the planet to simply make fun of “conspiracy theories” in order to discredit the concept of an all powerful ruling secret elite. However, if there’s no truth to it, then why would such wealthy and influential men bother to ridicule it in such a desperate and transparent manner?

Ironically, this ‘funny video’ will only end up generating more interest in the illuminati, which can only be a good thing and judging by the majority of the comments underpinning the video, people have seen through it and don’t enjoy being patronised by self indulgent, sycophantic billionaires.


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